Dealing with the firehouse ‘know-it-all’

A few years ago, I wrote an article titled, “Reducing the Heat at the Fire Station Kitchen Table.” In the post, I identified the firehouse dining table as a place where firefighters break bread with fellow firefighters, (unofficially) solve the department’s problems, drink coffee, tell the best stories and sometimes shed tears together.

But that table also serves something that can cause more indigestion that last night’s leftover chili: the firehouse “know-it-all.”

Much like a five-alarm fire, the presence of a department know-it-all can cause significant concern within an organization. Here’s what they bring to the table (besides unsolicited commentary):

• A lack of collaboration. When someone insists they’re the smartest person in the room (or the department), teamwork tends to go out the window. Their dominance can stifle others from contributing ideas or asking questions.
• Morale killer. There’s nothing like having your input steamrolled in every meeting. Constant one-upmanship can wear down even the most resilient team members.
• Creativity? Crushed. The fire service thrives on innovation and adaptation. Know-it-alls, however, tend to prefer the status quo — particularly if it revolves around them.
• Leadership disruption. By hijacking discussions or challenging leadership’s goals, these people can derail focus and disrupt departmental progress.

And here’s the kicker: While the above behavior is overt, the real danger is often more subtle — the erosion of trust and mutual respect among team members. Over time, resentment brews and division can set in.

Knowing the know-it-all

When someone feels compelled to have the last word on everything, regardless of how accurate or relevant their input actually is, they’re likely seen by others as a know-it-all. They could be fueled by a need for validation, or they might just genuinely love sharing knowledge — tact or timing be damned.

Interestingly, being a know-it-all isn’t always rooted in arrogance. While the term might perfectly describe someone who dominates conversations or dismisses others’ viewpoints, it could also reflect a person who’s simply enthusiastic about learning and sharing what they know. Sometimes it comes from a need to feel seen or valued. Or, in rarer cases, it’s just someone who read a book once and won’t stop quoting it. Either way, the difference lies in the delivery:

• Do they listen and engage respectfully?
• Are they open to hearing others?
• Or do they steamroll and dismiss?

Sadly, being a know-it-all is often a sign of deep insecurity. For some, acting like they have all the answers can be a defense mechanism to mask feelings of inadequacy.

Hint: If someone habitually answers their own questions during staff meetings, you may be in the presence of a bona-fide know-it-all.

Why they do what they do

Let’s break it down. As anyone who’s dealt with them knows, know-it-alls often suffer from a condition known as “I-Got-This-Itis.” Here are a few possible root causes:

• Validation vacuum. They feel the need for recognition, and they think expertise (real or imagined) is their ticket.
• Insecurity camouflage. Acting like they have all the answers hides the fear that they don’t.
• Control addiction. Knowledge equals power, and power equals security. It’s a warm, fuzzy blanket they refuse to share.
• Passion overload. Sometimes they’re just overly excited about the subject at hand. (Even if that subject is hydrant threads. Again.)

How to deal with a know-it-all

Know-it-alls are a unique breed. They can often dominate conversations, making it hard for others to feel heard or valued. At best, they’re the gift that keeps on giving; at worst, they can drain firehouse morale and even cause you to lose good people.

Here’s how to handle know-it-alls gracefully without losing your cool or your sanity:

• Stay confident but composed. Don’t get sucked into a know-it-all’s game. Your quiet confidence can speak volumes.
• Ask thoughtful questions. Redirect the conversation with follow-ups that prompt broader dialogue, not monologues.
• Share your perspective. Frame your thoughts as contributions to the discussion. Rather than challenging a know-it-all outright, offer your insights as complementary.
• Set boundaries. If their behavior starts to frustrate you, it’s okay to steer the conversation away or step back if it becomes one-sided or unproductive .
• Bonus move: Use humor to disarm. A well-placed sarcastic quip can often help reset the tone. Just don’t go full stand-up roast unless you really want a meeting with HR.

No policy for the know-it-all

While there might not be anything specific in your agency’s policies about “Dealing with Greg from B-Shift Who Knows Everything About Everything,” there are several ways leadership can address the problem of know-it-alls:

• Keep it professional. Stay calm and focus on behavior, not personality. Use facts and feedback, rather than frustrations.
• Channel their knowledge. If they have something to offer, give them an outlet. Ask for ideas — constructively and within bounds.
• Establish respectful boundaries. If someone’s behavior is overbearing, politely but assertively set limits to ensure a balanced discussion. Make sure meetings have structure, expectations, and opportunities for everyone to speak.
• Document interactions. If the overwhelming need to pontificate becomes a pattern — especially one that disrupts operations or morale — keep careful records and bring in supervision or HR as needed.
• Encourage a collaborative mindset. Emphasize teamwork and highlight the value of diverse perspectives. Use training, leadership examples and other activities to reinforce the idea of “we” vs. “me.”

And if all else fails, assign your department know-it-all to write the next training manual. At least that way, they might get it out of their system.

Turning a pain into a positive

Believe it or not, even know-it-alls can grow and change. Yes, seriously. With some guidance, feedback, and maybe a little self-awareness (or a coffee-fueled intervention), they can shift from being a source of friction to being a resource. Some of the most passionate know-it-alls eventually make great instructors, policy advisors or subject matter experts — once they learn to share the spotlight with their colleagues.

As leaders, it’s important to nurture your team members’ strengths while correcting course when behavior affects the team. Not every know-it-all is a lost cause; some just need a little reprogramming.

Final thoughts from the kitchen table

The firehouse kitchen table remains a sacred space. It’s where we connect, decompress and yes, debate. We don’t need to agree on everything, but we do need to respect everyone who pulls up a chair. Dealing with the department know-it-all isn’t about winning every argument. It’s about protecting culture, morale and the shared mission of public safety.

So, the next time someone starts reciting the department manual from memory, take a breath, take a sip of your burnt coffee and remind yourself: We’re all just trying to make it through the shift.

Except the know-it-all. They’re trying to be everyone’s personal Morgan Freeman, narrating the events of the day like every shift is an extended movie trailer. (“In a world where one person knows everything…”)

And remember: You can disagree without disrespect, you can educate without condescending, and you can lead without knowing everything.

Even if someone else at the table thinks they already do.

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