Hydrantgirl: Not the outcome I had worked so hard for.....

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Not the outcome I had worked so hard for.....
By Hydrantgirl

So here’s the deal. I was almost at the end of my fire testing last week; in fact I was so close I could taste it. In the summer I had written the fire test (and was one of 8 out of 80 to pass). In the fall I did the practical.

Then last week I had the fitness test — the very last test. I’ve been working with a personal trainer for almost 2 years to prepare for the test from hell — you know the one. Walk up a steep incline at a brisk walk for 8 mins in full gear with a mask and tank. Climb the ladder till your legs want to fall off. Drag around a dummy that weighs as much as you do. (I’m not bitching about the test because I know it’s a requirement to do the job but rather giving you an idea it’s not a walk in the park). I was prepared.

Then I got bronchitis 2 weeks before the test — 2 rounds of steroids, an inhaler and 2 rounds of antibiotics in a mad attempt to be healthy. Come test time I was given incorrect information on the options to back out of the test for medical reasons. I showed up to the test sick, and used up my one and only shot.

I am now disqualified from the process. “You’re welcome to apply to the external testing” which means I’m back at square one for the fire AND medical testing (because I’m not crossing over as a medic within the department they have to also test me as a new paramedic). Written and practical testing x 2.

Insert tears here.

I’ve written letters and talked to all the right people, and they won’t budge an inch even though I’ve provided them with all kinds of medical documentation. And to boot, my bronchitis is now pneumonia.

I was really hoping to write a post about how I’ve been keeping this secret and that we’re all celebrating the end of a very long journey and how my dream has finally come true. Instead I write this.

So I’m back to the beginning and applying with every Joe Schmoe that’s waited 6 years for the city to open positions to the public (because up to now you had to be a medic first, then cross over within the department to suppression. Which is what I was trying to do).

Back to studying for more tests and hoping and praying I can get my shit together one. more. time.

I feel defeated.

I feel like a phony for saying I’m any kind of firefighter when 2 1/2 years later I’m not.

I feel like I shouldn’t be calling myself Hydrantgirl.

And I feel sorry for firefighter for having to put up with me.